Friday, January 1, 2016

That's a wrap!

It's all over now, 2015 that is.  It seemed like it alternated between running away like a speeding train and dragging on forever.  It really wasn't such a great year for me in many respects, but in others it was a year of learning and accomplishment.

I reentered the work force as an office temp and now it seems I may have a job.  The job is great.  I love what I do, so far.  I started down one path, I really did have a plan to see it through and start a new direction in December, but then the temp slot opened up in early December, one thing led to another and my path got diverted.  No one can change the flow of a river without some losses.  I've had to delay the classes I was taking, and I had to change my deadline promise to myself.  It's a promise I intend to keep, but I'm using the longer date range.  I guess that just goes to show me, that no matter how clear the road map seems, there can always be a detour and often a very lovely one at that.  For now, I'm embracing my detour with open mind, open heart and open arms.

Our son is growing up, he's making changes, he's making mistakes (often fairly big mistakes) which I hope he's learning from, he's learning to communicate as a young adult.  We need to work together to help him set some realistic goals for 2016.  This year we learned that a bachelor's degree may no longer make fiscal sense.  I was attempting to show him that teachers do make a fairly decent wage, "look son, see, they do make more than you thought but you will probably want to have a wife who also works.  See, these are two year degrees and look how little they make..." the words died on my lips as we saw those associate's degrees pay more for entry level than a teacher with a master's degree would make.  Our son is now trying to decide which path would make the most sense for him.  We are all coming to terms with the face of the workplace today.

Our cat had his 13th birthday last May.  He got a new sofa, new carpet, and a climbing tree this year.  He trusts none of that stuff.  He is not as afraid to touch the sofa and has been diligently clawing one corner of the sofa to keep it in check while demonstrating his dominance over all furniture and soft things.  He sometimes will drag a piece of meat onto the carpet so it knows the pecking order too.  He got the climbing thing for Christmas, he is still regarding it with suspicion.

One thing led to another and we ended up having to donate the first new car we've ever bought back in July/August.  It appears a national chain tire shop lied to us about the damage.  We found out, only after we'd bought another car.  We got a gently used 2014 Cruze LTZ with less than 18k miles on it.  We do love the new (to us) car but we do miss our L300.  We got the full blue book price as a deduction because our car did sell, and rather quickly too.  Our son felt terrible about the L300, that was the first car he really remembers riding in and it became his car after he got his license.  We bought her brand new back in 2004 in TX.  He's since acquired our 2003 Vue.  He doesn't like it as much as he liked his car, but he is adapting.  He did the only thing he could do, to avoid an accident.  He didn't lock up the brakes, he started braking and steered toward the curb to avoid an accident.  His instincts are great when it comes to driving.  A pick-up truck pulled out right in front of him on a busy road.  The other drivers scare me, his driving doesn't scare me.

I lost a lot of people I cared about this past year.  The worst of the losses was a friend's son.  Nothing causes a Mother and Father to cling to their child and overlook some things their child does than the death of another child.  After that death I hovered a lot and am still a bit clingy.

I cut some negative people out of my life and feel liberated.

I learned that some people are a lot more monstrous and depraved than I had ever imagined.  I did get angry with God and question him.  I know that's not likely to produce answers, but it felt like unburdening to me.  I still believe, I still pray, but I wonder why some things are allowed to happen.  I know, the whole "free will" thing.  I think some actions are beyond "free will" and that certain people should probably just be exterminated.

My goals for the coming year are modest....hold on for the ride and hope for the best.

I hope that you have a healthy, happy year ahead of you.

Thank you for reading my wordy ramblings

No comments: