Sunday, September 16, 2012

Being a kid today must be horrible

I remember Saturday mornings.  Oh how I loved Saturday mornings as a child!  I would jump out of bed with the grace and beauty of a drunken rhino and charge down the hallway all disheveled at full tilt to the living room.  I would zoom to the television like the misconcepted lemming to a cliff.  I would then dial my channel (one of four!!!) and turn on the tv.  Oh the feel of the knob in my chubby little hand! The wonder! The glory! The rapture!  It was.....cartoon time!!!!!!

I would alternately, sit, stand or lie on the sofa singing along with such catchy  theme songs as, "Marshall, Will and Holly on a routine expedition....(yada yada) laaand of the loooost".  Who could forget that fuzzy kid?  He always reminded me, for whatever misfit synapse, of what a glass of ginger ale might look like should it come to life.  The sleestaks scared me.  At night on the potty I would look at the shadow my feet cast hanging there; then being a morbid little cuss, I'd move my toes a certain way so the shadow reminded me vaguely of sleestak feet.  I would then swear the sleestaks were coming and I'd run back to bed.

There was the Shazam/Isis hour...all I remember of that song is 'Shazam!, Isis'  I think Isis turned around when her name was stage whispered.  I know I would feel like I'd failed the week, if I didn't turn around at the right time.  It was either that show or Wonder Woman.  I really think it was Isis though.....i digress.

I would have a bowl of C'apn Crunch, while watching "Honeycomb's big yeah, yeah, yeah! It's not small no, no,no.  Honeycomb's got a...."blah blah bite, crunch taste.  I didn't eat it.  I just wanted to go to the hide out!  At one point there wasca cowboy for Corn Pops, of course the stoned bear for Sugar Crisp (later Super Golden Crisp)..."Hey Kool-Aid, Oh Yeah!", "Let's get Mikey! Yeah he won't eat anything! Hey, Mikey?! He likes it"

Then that new cartoon The had narration in the first series.  The narrator said "long, long ago. Deep in a forest.......(yada yada)..... And if you're good, you may just catch a glimpse of the smurfs"
There was "Hong Kong Phooey, number one super guy....."  He wasn't so super, the poor cat did all the work! I loved 'opahraytah Rosemary'
"Flintstone's, meet the Flintstone's! They're the modern stone-age family....."
"Meet George Jetson! His boy Elroy! Daughter Judy! Jane his wife!....(catchy chopsticks song bit)...Jane! Get me off this crazy thing!"    I still want a flying car! And a robot house cleaner!
Baggypants and the nitwits, savior faire is everywhere, yogi bear, i've forgotten so many and I keep remembering more as I write!
Then American Bandstand!  Finally, The Soooouuuuul Train"
Then boredom set in....the day dragged on, until....
The Love Boat, soon will be making another run.....
and,     Boss, de plane, de plane!.....
I am Mr. Roarke, your host.....welcome to Fantasy Island!
Geez I miss Saturday!!

Kids today have cartoons on demand.  They should have to wait for them.....just like the good ole days.

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