Sunday, April 15, 2012

Free Wine For Life??!?!?!??

I was in the kitchen half listening to the television as I contemplated the Baconnaise in my hands and the carton of gaily dyed boiled eggs before me.    
While listening to the television and tuning out the infomercial for The Lithium Worx GT™ I calmly gathered my supplies.  I was being responsible, texting friends, peeling eggs, smiling at my egg platters…when I heard this line

“Comes with free wine for life”

COME AGAIN???!!!  I was ready to drop the eggs and order one now!!  I had no idea how much this hedge or edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy cost;  I didn’t even know how to spell it, (until I looked it up when writing this entry)…but come on it has free wine for life!!  NOTHING, absolutely nothing ever comes with free wine for life.  A power thingy we don’t need; because we have a guy we pay to mow the lawn and edge, but if it was cost effective then I was definitely on board!  I just needed to know a few important details; 

What type of wine?  How long is the time frame between bottles?  How many bottles per time frame?  What constituted “life”?  Could I sign my teen-aged son up to receive this free wine also if I purchased a second edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy?   Is the wine supply transferrable if we give the edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy to someone else?  Do we have to keep the edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy in working order and charged at all times?  Does it report back to home base if we don’t use it?  Will the edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy transmit the data that we are drinking the wine all by ourselves?   Must we drink the wine while using the edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy?  What if the edger /trimmer -doohickey- thingy breaks do we still get the wine, or must we get it repaired first?  What happens to the guarantee if the company tanks due to wine over consumption?

I was slammed back down to Earth by that annoying logical voice in my head who calmly stated;
 "Look lush! What power tool is going to come with free wine you moron?  The people said LINE not WINE! LINE, LINE you know the stuff that breaks off and slaps you in the leg!  Good grief you don't even drink wine!!!!  What the heck?? Put the phone down now!! Make me those eggs with Baconnaise right this moment!! wine!!  Good grief what will this fool come up with next??  I need some vodka!  Get busy on those eggs hands!!"

After my gentle logical inner voice reminded me that edger /trimmer -doohickey- things do indeed use line I dried my copious tears and resumed peeling eggs in a much less gleeful manner.

I did however perk up considerably after the creation of my deviled eggs

Egg yolks
Extra hot horseradish
dill pickle relish

  It can be purchased here  Baconnaise  it is amazing!

So, my day didn't end with the celebration of, Free Wine For Life??!?!?!??  But I did make some down right tasty eggs!


Anonymous said...

I was ready to order a doohikey trimming thing for each member of our family too............ and I don't like deviled eggs :(

Anonymous said...

#1...I, too, dislike deviled eggs. They will bewitch their nosher.

Eve said...

hahahahaha! OMG! I was gonna order one too and I don't even drink! It would just be too good a deal to pass up!
I've never heard of Baconnaise....until now! We don't have it up here in these parts.