tick tock, oink, plink, meow, tinkle, purr, shushing, shushing (skiing)...real onomatopoeia are all weird words and kind of fun words to say. But there are other words, real words, tangible words that often people find themselves repeating because they either sound so nifty are fun to say or are just plain weird. Like the word onomatopoeia....that's just plain weird! I understand the root and all, but the name doesn't conjure that image up for me. It makes me think of some incurable infection.
doctor~ "I'm sorry ma'am, I hate to be the one to tell you but you have..."
woman (interrupting)~ "oh no! don't tell me it's bubonic plague!"
doctor~ "No ma'am"
woman (sobbing) "oh thank heavens!"
doctor~ "It's worse than that, I fear!"
woman (gasps) "tell me it's not..."
doctor~ "I'm afraid that it is"
simultaneous~ "onomatopoeia!!!"
woman (wailing)
Mourners at the funeral solemnly place the blame with the day she went shushing down the slopes accompanied by the merry tinkle of bangle bracelets, while listening to a sound track of cats meowing and purring in time with the tick tock of a clock. The only one who would ever know how the woman contracted the deadly onomatopoeia infection was her pet cockroach. The truth lay concealed behind her headboard...it was the chewing gum she was too ashamed to continue keeping on the bedpost over night. The cockroach saw his chance, ate the gum, promptly contracted the deadly onomatopoeia infection and wiped out the entire apartment complex's roach population.
Other words I find irritating are duty, lugubrious, scissors, studio, apple, bucolic, dog, serendipity, camaraderie, calisthenics, aerobics, donkey, bowel, medicine ball, 'tude (short for attitude) zenith because it reminds me of Judith,(not that there is anything wrong with the name Judith, I just had a nasty run in with a Judith and it scared me until along came Judith Light in Who's the Boss...it kind of dispelled the Judith scare but not entirely...I guess that's more a phobia than a word aversion) pizza pie, supper, there are more...my insanity runs deep. I try to avoid saying those words. (yes I am entirely sober) I don't think I like that word either, sober.
Words I like are diaphanous, cumbersome, nebulous, zephyr, nadir, linoleum, pizza, pie, lemon, Antigone, radio, television, tv, dinner, honey (but I don't really like honey all that much unless I have a sore throat) rhubarb, blueberry, cherry, cat, lion, wolf, hamburger, horse, down, up, down pillow, pillow, ball, bell, glia, pencil, play, pond, pussy willow, willow tree, tree, worm, dirt, grass, plastic, paper, cradle, cuddle, gel, jelly, bread, milk, potato, sunflower, flowers. Those are all really fun words to say. I like the way they roll off the tongue, the way the sound when said. I like words that tend to sound like the beginning of a song, or are lyrical. What's lyrical to me may certainly be poison to your own ears.
I will try to find a way to work one or more of my favorite words into a conversation. There are times I sing the "L" is such a lovely letter song because so many favorite words are in there! Linoleum, lollipop, lemon, lightbulb. I may have already done something similar with a post about liking the letter "L" but this goes beyond that. There are entire words I actually will go out of my way to avoid saying. If I hear one it really annoys me and I find myself looking for a word to cancel the irritating word out. Wow...I may need therapy after a re-read! Pity my husband and son!
What are your words of avoidance and words of choice...I know you have them.
Welcome to me. This is my life, my mind, my imagination, my struggles and triumphs along with the silliness of day to day life. I have issues with my hands, ignore misspells. It is most definitely improving, but older posts may be hard to read. This blog is about nothing special, just a housewife, Mother and a person coping with life.
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
Wednesday, May 8, 2013
A Cure??
I see a cure as further than I ever imagined…..
Just sounding off on this....I used to think that a
"cure" for SCI was just around the corner, especially after
Christopher Reeve was injured and that Super bowl commercial came out. Now that I've been dealing with a mild cord
injury and an odd one at that, I never would have understood (still don't
really, it seems too odd) that spinal cord injuries came in more than one basic
type. I don't see a "cure" as really
coming any time soon. There are so many variables. I have horrific burning nerve pain, I can't
process sensory information worth a darn, my motor coordination is good most of
the time but things don't respond quite right....
Now imagine that a person with the SCI has zero function,
zero sensation and has been dealing with that for let's say 2 years also. They still remember walking, moving, going to
the bathroom and long for it more than anything. That person gets "the cure" but they wake up to nerve pain burning off
the charts, nothing responds the way they remember it or expect it, they don't
always need to cath but don't understand that they need to time bathroom
functions or find other methods to empty.
How can that be a cure for them when it plunges them into a
new form of nightmare oddness. In my sci
groups people say they'd do anything to be "cured" to "walk again",
"go to the bathroom again”, but when I ask them if they would pass it to
their children...they clam up. When I
ask if the "cure" left them nearing insanity from the sensory
overload and hypersensitivity...they also clam up.
I think people are mistaken when they think a “cure” will
mean a return to normal. I no longer see
that as happening. I see that perhaps
the most people can expect is some return of feeling, maybe some muscle
movement, but how long will it take to build those atrophied muscles back
up? Will they get enough messages to the
muscles to build them up or will it leave people in a greater state of disability
than before, because of too much information and no way to process it? What if a person is married, has kids, a job
and a full life by most definitions…then all that goes away because the cure
ruins the peace they had. I can see that
happening in some cases. There are so
many types of paralysis and incomplete paralysis, things I never considered
until I met more people and they met me.
What would a cure even be considered? Walking? Feeling? Going to the bathroom? Etc….(wink
wink). Some people even have full
sensory ability but zero motor function…what if the cure left them with no
feeling but the ability to walk, but in the process they lost (wink wink) So may what if’s!
How long will it take to figure this out? I am aware there have been many strides with
stem cells, I know there are other trials going on. I can’t help but wonder what this will mean
for so many people. It’s exciting and sobering.
Thursday, May 2, 2013
Tamales.......mmmmm........
I've been making tamales for days now. It's a bit more tiring than it was before, but the reward is so yummy!!!
Tuesday, April 23, 2013
Spring is broken
Well spring was springing. Now our crocuses are lying sad, frozen and dead. I'm not sure what the rest of the flowers have done, are doing, are planning on doing, or if they really care. I attempted to help the guys mulch a bit (gee won't the neighborhood lawn nazi's be happy) in a vain attempt to keep down some weeds.
Spring is ok, I don't mind it....but it brings summer. My most dreaded time of year. The horrible, bright shiny sun, the heat, those stupid May bugs that people insist are June bugs, but they can't be June bugs because June bugs are cute little scarab looking things around the size of an oat. That's what Mama told me and I will swear that's what they are. The others are just hideous May bugs. They shouldn't even be able to fly! Hideous brown unwieldy things.
Our cat LOVES spring, and summer....from 5am until about 9pm we hear canigooutcanigooutcanigoout, outoutoutout, in various forms of meows, groans and attempting to chew open windows. He loves to eat grass, chase bugs and until summer before last, enjoyed playing on a swingset. The swingset was taken down and he was FURIOUS.
Spring is a crazy time here, for some reason when our son goes out...he comes home smelling like some type of odd fish, covered in mud, swearing he was no where near the frog pond. I'm not even sure how frogs live there, because the lawn nazi's all fertilize the living crap out of their grass for the 2-3 months it grows. All of this fertilizer runs into the frog pond. Algae blooms EVERYWHERE in every pond in every yard with a pond because of this insane need to fertilize. Why can't nature just take it's course and leave grass dry in the hot summer the way it should be. If things were supposed to be green they would be green naturally...(that does not apply to hair color!)
I refuse to spend well over $1,000 between water and fertilizer to make my neighbors happy. I got the thistles (love them!) because of them and their insane need to feed birds thistle seed. At this point if they don't like my thistles which have now hopefully blown into all their yards then they can stop feeding thistle seed or come weed my yard. I'm medically not allowed to weed my lawn (yay bad neck!) the guys don't have time....so lets put that neighborly gossip train and back stab bandwagon to work helping out people.
I tried to and did shovel my driveway and walk with my cane winter before last (that has been disallowed too! again yay neck!) people stopped, stood, watched and commented to their kids...but not one single person (all men) even offered to help. So neighbors who want nice lawns....work on your own, and leave my weeds alone!
The fact still remains spring is broken and can remain broken until well into July! I can't tolerate heat anyway :)
Spring is ok, I don't mind it....but it brings summer. My most dreaded time of year. The horrible, bright shiny sun, the heat, those stupid May bugs that people insist are June bugs, but they can't be June bugs because June bugs are cute little scarab looking things around the size of an oat. That's what Mama told me and I will swear that's what they are. The others are just hideous May bugs. They shouldn't even be able to fly! Hideous brown unwieldy things.
Our cat LOVES spring, and summer....from 5am until about 9pm we hear canigooutcanigooutcanigoout, outoutoutout, in various forms of meows, groans and attempting to chew open windows. He loves to eat grass, chase bugs and until summer before last, enjoyed playing on a swingset. The swingset was taken down and he was FURIOUS.
Spring is a crazy time here, for some reason when our son goes out...he comes home smelling like some type of odd fish, covered in mud, swearing he was no where near the frog pond. I'm not even sure how frogs live there, because the lawn nazi's all fertilize the living crap out of their grass for the 2-3 months it grows. All of this fertilizer runs into the frog pond. Algae blooms EVERYWHERE in every pond in every yard with a pond because of this insane need to fertilize. Why can't nature just take it's course and leave grass dry in the hot summer the way it should be. If things were supposed to be green they would be green naturally...(that does not apply to hair color!)
I refuse to spend well over $1,000 between water and fertilizer to make my neighbors happy. I got the thistles (love them!) because of them and their insane need to feed birds thistle seed. At this point if they don't like my thistles which have now hopefully blown into all their yards then they can stop feeding thistle seed or come weed my yard. I'm medically not allowed to weed my lawn (yay bad neck!) the guys don't have time....so lets put that neighborly gossip train and back stab bandwagon to work helping out people.
I tried to and did shovel my driveway and walk with my cane winter before last (that has been disallowed too! again yay neck!) people stopped, stood, watched and commented to their kids...but not one single person (all men) even offered to help. So neighbors who want nice lawns....work on your own, and leave my weeds alone!
The fact still remains spring is broken and can remain broken until well into July! I can't tolerate heat anyway :)
Wednesday, April 17, 2013
I am raising myself
I hear the sassing, whining, nasal snottiness and it's like I'm listening to 14 year old me. I am positive I have written about this before. I am also positive I was every bit as sassy and horrible as my son is. I can hear me coming out of his mouth. Not grown up me brimming with some wisdom, but horrible teenage me brimming with imagined logic and wisdom. Kind of the way future me will be laughing at how ignorant and self important the now me is.
It still amazes me that I am alive at all. The Grandmother curse is true.."I hope you have a child just like you" My sassy brat thinks this would be just fine. "Good! I hope I do, because I like me!" I am glad he does because he is down a few fans in the form of parents at the moment. Today was just so horrible it was comical. 6 separate times he was asked to put away his clothes. Those are my emergency pants for summer, those are pants I might wear to school tomorrow, that's a shirt I might wear to school tomorrow (you wore it yesterday) ok then I might wear it the day after, those are socks I might wear tomorrow. I can't put any of that awaaaaayyyy!!! I NEEED a shower! Don't you understand? I DON'T NEED TO PUT ANY OF THIS AWAY! You're such a jerk!! No one asked you to do my laundry anyway! I had clothes!! This goes on in spurts from 2:40 until 8pm
Did you clean the litter box? Yeeeesssss! Gosh! (I recleaned the litter box and left the non existent litter in a bag on the stairs) What's this?? (the litter you must have missed) FINE!!! 2:45-2:50pm
Fortunately we didn't have any dishes to put away tonight I can't imagine where they would have ended up. I have rewashed clean dishes because he didn't feel like putting them away, taken down dirty dishes he put away because he was "In a hurry because you're being so mean to me!!!" usually about 45 minutes to put away a dishwasher load of dishes
I am wondering if I can plead some sort of insanity, perhaps sign myself into some treatment program. I wonder if I could quickly become an alcoholic or drug addict for a brief stint in treatment? The sad thing is..about 15 minutes after deciding running away or homicide might be a good idea...I no longer want to throttle him, but I find myself wanting to hold him and tell him I love him, then spend time with him. Perhaps I really AM insane? What sane person would want to hug this rapidly growing, teenager, sassy, annoying sometimes idiotic thing I live with? I must be totally insane. Nothing has taught me I'm insane any better than parenting has. There should be a parents only halfway house where we can run for a few hours a day or a week as need be.
I am going to kind of enjoy the day when my sweet little angel calls to tell me "I am ready to strangle this brat child of mine! He REFUSES to put away his clothes!! Gosh!" I'm sure I will still be finding underwear he has hidden in various places throughout the house with him on the phone complaining about my darling, wonderful grand child who will of course do no wrong.....hahahahahahaha
I know my grandma is in heaven just LOVING this!
It still amazes me that I am alive at all. The Grandmother curse is true.."I hope you have a child just like you" My sassy brat thinks this would be just fine. "Good! I hope I do, because I like me!" I am glad he does because he is down a few fans in the form of parents at the moment. Today was just so horrible it was comical. 6 separate times he was asked to put away his clothes. Those are my emergency pants for summer, those are pants I might wear to school tomorrow, that's a shirt I might wear to school tomorrow (you wore it yesterday) ok then I might wear it the day after, those are socks I might wear tomorrow. I can't put any of that awaaaaayyyy!!! I NEEED a shower! Don't you understand? I DON'T NEED TO PUT ANY OF THIS AWAY! You're such a jerk!! No one asked you to do my laundry anyway! I had clothes!! This goes on in spurts from 2:40 until 8pm
Did you clean the litter box? Yeeeesssss! Gosh! (I recleaned the litter box and left the non existent litter in a bag on the stairs) What's this?? (the litter you must have missed) FINE!!! 2:45-2:50pm
Fortunately we didn't have any dishes to put away tonight I can't imagine where they would have ended up. I have rewashed clean dishes because he didn't feel like putting them away, taken down dirty dishes he put away because he was "In a hurry because you're being so mean to me!!!" usually about 45 minutes to put away a dishwasher load of dishes
I am wondering if I can plead some sort of insanity, perhaps sign myself into some treatment program. I wonder if I could quickly become an alcoholic or drug addict for a brief stint in treatment? The sad thing is..about 15 minutes after deciding running away or homicide might be a good idea...I no longer want to throttle him, but I find myself wanting to hold him and tell him I love him, then spend time with him. Perhaps I really AM insane? What sane person would want to hug this rapidly growing, teenager, sassy, annoying sometimes idiotic thing I live with? I must be totally insane. Nothing has taught me I'm insane any better than parenting has. There should be a parents only halfway house where we can run for a few hours a day or a week as need be.
I am going to kind of enjoy the day when my sweet little angel calls to tell me "I am ready to strangle this brat child of mine! He REFUSES to put away his clothes!! Gosh!" I'm sure I will still be finding underwear he has hidden in various places throughout the house with him on the phone complaining about my darling, wonderful grand child who will of course do no wrong.....hahahahahahaha
I know my grandma is in heaven just LOVING this!
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Our cat hates us
Yesterday was not a happy day in the life of our kitty cat.
For the past year our cat has been struggling with allergies. It's been a real fight because he had some bacteria that went undiagnosed. When he was finally diagnosed after a few unsuccessful rounds of antibiotics we were told that he had likely damaged his nasal structures and would have allergies. They did blood work the results only showed high allergy markers, we were told what otc's were safe for him to take, how much and how often. The poor kitty has been sneezing large volumes of mucus for months. The last month I noticed it didn't seem the same.
Suddenly the mucus stopped. He still sneezed, but nothing came out. Then his eye started to look runny and puffy. I washed it with a warm cloth. It didn't get better, the swelling increased. I made an appointment on Tuesday for Saturday. I can't navigate him in and out of the building by myself. I needed my son or husband with me. Saturday was the only day. Later Tuesday he was looking like he had gone a few rounds with an MMA fighter. I called that evening, they could see him Wednesday evening. He just looked worse the next morning. I seriously began to wonder if he was sneaking out and having cage fights. By the time his appointment rolled around his eye looked very pink near the tear duct, his forehead was swollen and to touch his face would illicit the big paw. (the big paw is when he makes his paw as large as possible and sticks every single claw out, then pushes) I got the big paw when I tried a warm compress before we left.
We got him to the vet. I got my son to lacrosse practice then came back to find an unhappy cat with a grumpy husband. Cat had lidocaine on spot on his forehead. Eventually the vet came back. She was brandishing a needle to aspirate his forehead bump. Cats are bendy.....very bendy, they are also part liquid...very liquid. Eventually she got the needle in, nothing seemed to come out. She left.
We were pointedly ignored after several snorts, tail twitches and in general pissy cat behaviour. Apparently she did get a few cells out and the news was good. Nothing horrible was wrong. We got antibiotics for bruiser and some steroids. He already looks better after one antibiotic. He ate a lot of ham tonight but still isn't very happy with us. He seems to no longer be plotting our demise, but I did get the big paw tonight giving him his pills.
For the past year our cat has been struggling with allergies. It's been a real fight because he had some bacteria that went undiagnosed. When he was finally diagnosed after a few unsuccessful rounds of antibiotics we were told that he had likely damaged his nasal structures and would have allergies. They did blood work the results only showed high allergy markers, we were told what otc's were safe for him to take, how much and how often. The poor kitty has been sneezing large volumes of mucus for months. The last month I noticed it didn't seem the same.
Suddenly the mucus stopped. He still sneezed, but nothing came out. Then his eye started to look runny and puffy. I washed it with a warm cloth. It didn't get better, the swelling increased. I made an appointment on Tuesday for Saturday. I can't navigate him in and out of the building by myself. I needed my son or husband with me. Saturday was the only day. Later Tuesday he was looking like he had gone a few rounds with an MMA fighter. I called that evening, they could see him Wednesday evening. He just looked worse the next morning. I seriously began to wonder if he was sneaking out and having cage fights. By the time his appointment rolled around his eye looked very pink near the tear duct, his forehead was swollen and to touch his face would illicit the big paw. (the big paw is when he makes his paw as large as possible and sticks every single claw out, then pushes) I got the big paw when I tried a warm compress before we left.
We got him to the vet. I got my son to lacrosse practice then came back to find an unhappy cat with a grumpy husband. Cat had lidocaine on spot on his forehead. Eventually the vet came back. She was brandishing a needle to aspirate his forehead bump. Cats are bendy.....very bendy, they are also part liquid...very liquid. Eventually she got the needle in, nothing seemed to come out. She left.
We were pointedly ignored after several snorts, tail twitches and in general pissy cat behaviour. Apparently she did get a few cells out and the news was good. Nothing horrible was wrong. We got antibiotics for bruiser and some steroids. He already looks better after one antibiotic. He ate a lot of ham tonight but still isn't very happy with us. He seems to no longer be plotting our demise, but I did get the big paw tonight giving him his pills.
Wednesday, April 3, 2013
temporary distraction?
I can hear my son yammering away in the other room on xbox. He spends so much time on there chatting with friends, playing games, sharing cheats..etc. I think to myself, "it's just a temporary distraction, he will out grow it". The same with texting, "it's just a phase". I dawns on me with horror...he may never out grow either!
He doesn't spend hours on the phone the way I used to as a teenager. I assume guys did things like that too. Talk on the phone? Didn't they? I know I talked to guys on the phone when I was a teenage girl. We also met up to just go "walking around" large groups of us would go "walking around" We had no destination in mind, just the aimless shuffle from house to house collecting friends, saying "hi" to a Mom or Dad at home, then walking blocks to nowhere or perhaps the local park. We would also go outside and find a friend. That "seeing who's out" happens less and less. They seem to make all plans via text or xbox live before they ever set foot outside to go do something. Even when the doing something involves boxing in our basement there are rituals they adhere to, texting, xboxing, time syncing, dressing, putting on cologne but not brushing one's hair or teeth.
Other horrors radio, television, movies, rock n roll (all things said to be a fad or passing fancy) are all most of us know now, it's how we grew up. I have never known life without all those things. My Mom knew life with out television, telephones and rock n roll. My Grandparents knew life without cars, telephones, televisions and not every one had a radio. I look back at my own life, I knew life without a color tv for years, a home with only one tv until I was in my late 20's, telephones on the wall, a one phone home, no cell phones, a computer wasn't in many homes, there was no access to the internet even in the 80's with a computer. All we used computers for in school were to type word processor documents and fill in some answers on a math quiz. I don't recall it actually checking the math. I'm sure it could. We were just too amazed that we were typing on something that didn't clack and have a piece of paper in it. Saving work to a floppy disk and printing it out later was kind of weird. Working on a paper little bits at a time, coming back revising it? Mind-blowing I remember our first computer in the late 90's. Search engines were a strange thing to navigate, I knew of metacrawler, hotbot and some nameless search engine that the emachine 300 or whatever it was had.
Maybe x-box live, texting and skype are all here to stay and aren't temporary distractions.
He doesn't spend hours on the phone the way I used to as a teenager. I assume guys did things like that too. Talk on the phone? Didn't they? I know I talked to guys on the phone when I was a teenage girl. We also met up to just go "walking around" large groups of us would go "walking around" We had no destination in mind, just the aimless shuffle from house to house collecting friends, saying "hi" to a Mom or Dad at home, then walking blocks to nowhere or perhaps the local park. We would also go outside and find a friend. That "seeing who's out" happens less and less. They seem to make all plans via text or xbox live before they ever set foot outside to go do something. Even when the doing something involves boxing in our basement there are rituals they adhere to, texting, xboxing, time syncing, dressing, putting on cologne but not brushing one's hair or teeth.
Other horrors radio, television, movies, rock n roll (all things said to be a fad or passing fancy) are all most of us know now, it's how we grew up. I have never known life without all those things. My Mom knew life with out television, telephones and rock n roll. My Grandparents knew life without cars, telephones, televisions and not every one had a radio. I look back at my own life, I knew life without a color tv for years, a home with only one tv until I was in my late 20's, telephones on the wall, a one phone home, no cell phones, a computer wasn't in many homes, there was no access to the internet even in the 80's with a computer. All we used computers for in school were to type word processor documents and fill in some answers on a math quiz. I don't recall it actually checking the math. I'm sure it could. We were just too amazed that we were typing on something that didn't clack and have a piece of paper in it. Saving work to a floppy disk and printing it out later was kind of weird. Working on a paper little bits at a time, coming back revising it? Mind-blowing I remember our first computer in the late 90's. Search engines were a strange thing to navigate, I knew of metacrawler, hotbot and some nameless search engine that the emachine 300 or whatever it was had.
Maybe x-box live, texting and skype are all here to stay and aren't temporary distractions.
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